Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Idiot's Boxes

I press the yearning button to life. A few colours pop on a screen, human-like voices emanate and a few humans resuscitate to life.

They seemed to be dancing on a green field. A decent looking gentleman suddenly runs up to a brown patch and blasts a white object to another gentleman, who with his wooden kinda shield flogs it away. A melee ensues with more gentlemen scrambling for the white object. Alas, it disappears far away followed by loud hooting and jeering.

Bored, I click the next button on the itinerary.

A loud jarring thunderous sound irks me. The camera closes up on a middle-aged lady with anger in her eyes. The victim - a hot young girl in designer sari - effuses loathsome sobs in a multitude of glycerine tears. Vermillion is smudged on every woman's face. Men just seem to be puppets in this regime.

Bah. Click.

A huge banner "Breaking News" masks most of the bandwidth. A wonderful example of flouting rules and obscuring the "behind the banner" details. A vivacious lady blabbers on some violent incident. Suddenly, two old guys start bickering over the issue of who's responsible for the violence.

Fingers fiddle. Click.

Two black guys, who think they are cool, mumble incoherently in a raspy voice. They think they groove well by moving their hands. Semi-nude chicks, who think they are hot, cling to them like leeches. Oh yeah, there's some tune playing in the background.

Duh. Click.

In the middle of a black muddy ditch, two pigs cuddle up. A caption below reads 'A Pigs life'

Gross. Click.

Old Chinese warriors with long dreadlocks smattering pure English jumping up and down.

Grrrr. Click.

Dumb, fully-clothed, zombie-like, anorexic girls walk ogled by lechers.


A cat running after a mouse.

Wow. I put down the clicking instrument.

In a minute, it displays "The END. A Hanna Barbara Production"

I click the abominable red button.


I pick up the yearning book happily and turn to the bookmarked page.



Blogger Ayyappa said...

Hey Tejas,

Nice blog lampooning the TV channels. Except the Tom & Jerry everything on TV is just a crap.

11:38 PM  

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